These days, there’s an iPhone (or iPod Touch) application for everything. So many, in fact, that everything you’ll ever need is now in your pocket, just a click away. And that goes for getting your daily dose of hottness, too! So to keep you from having to spend precious time navigating iTunes for, we’ve put all the sexiest iPhone apps all in one place, Enjoy!
Let’s face it, the one thing pictures of hot chicks lacks is all the sexy motion. But no more! Using a 3D physics engine, Wobble allows you to add wobbling motions to any photo by overlaying a “wire frame” onto the photo, which morphs the pixels, allowing the iPhone’s accelerometer to make the pixels moves. Sure, it’s seems complicated, but all this happens with a few easy finger taps. And voila! Now that picture of your friend’s hot mom has the sexy motion it deserves.
Say you met a girl the night before at a bar, somehow managed to get her number and the next day you want to send her a cheeky text message to get her attention but your hangover-hammered brain can’t think of a single thing to type. That’s where Elite Text comes in. This simple little ditty generates all types of sexy, funny, flirtatious messages for you to send over to that sexy someone. Just don’t let her find out you’re taking your lines from a F’ing iPhone app, or your chances of getting to real sexy time are practically nil.
Even if you’re not looking for “sexy” iPhone apps, this high-quality app is cool - er, hot! Basically, it makes your iPhone’s screen look like the bathroom mirror after a hot shower. But it’s not just for looks. To haze-up the screen, just blow into your phone’s mic. You can then do anything to the screen that you can do with a real steamy mirror, like write messages, or clear away just enough to show sexy photos underneath, or write a secret message to a girl, hand her the phone and have her blow into the mic to reveal your message. The damn thing even squeaks when you rub your finger across the screen.
When you’re out at a bar, the hardest part of chatting up that super hottie is breaking the ice - which is exactly where iPickupLines comes in. Similar to Elite Text, this app provides you with pick-up lines and icebreakers to get the conversation flowing. So instead of stumbling over your own dumbass lines (or not having the creative juices to come up with any in the first place), this simple app will feed you funny, sometimes clever one-liners that will hopefully help you land her in the sack. But beware, if she catches you checking your phone before trying to pick her up, it’s game over from the get-go.
If you like super hot chicks in bikinis, which you most definitely do, then this is the app for you. Unlike a lot of iPhone apps that offer useful services like maps, currency conversions or, um, fart noises (?), Bikini Blast is an unadulterated flow of sexy iPhone backgrounds of hundreds of hot chicks wearing bikinis. New photos are added everyday. But unfortunately, iTunes won’t allow any topless pics, so that’s a definite bummer. But so what?
Exotic Adult Party Games
Sometimes, life just calls for a party game. And even better times call adult party games. Thanks to Exotic Adult Party Games, you can always have a sexy game for any occasion in your pocket. The app includes 120 games, ranging from joke games, to sexy adult games to questionnaire games to dancing games. Unfortunately, since the iTunes app store is a fairly family friendly place, these games don’t get nearly raunchy enough for most people (us included). But remember, PG-13 fun can turn into an all-out orgy in a matter of moments. (At least in our minds it can.)
Having a girlfriend can be tough. No only do you have to satisfy her eternally complicated hormonal ups and downs, but you have to have enough game to get a girlfriend in the first f**king place. But not anymore! Damn near better than the real thing, iGirl is a virtual 3D girlfriend that will do (pretty much) anything you say, from talking to dancing. With tons of built-in commands, iGirl allows you to tickly your iGirl, have her strike sexy poses and even gives you the ability to create custom commands. Unfortunately, “blow job” isn’t one of them…
Hooters Calendar Slider
Similar to the Bikini Blast app, the Hooters Calendar Slider takes the simple concept of “hot chicks wearing nearly nothing is awesome” and brings it to the iPhone in a simple yet satisfying app. But this time, instead of just backgrounds, the Hooters Calender Slider combines their sexy, top-heavy babes with the classic slider puzzle tile game to give you hours of fun. The game includes 60 levels of Hooters girls, 3 levels of difficulty and the ability to turn the solved puzzle images into super-sexy backgrounds.
Whether you admit it or not, (and why you wouldn’t is beyond us), playing with boobs is at the very top of quality activities. And now you can do it on your iPhone. Sure, it’s not exactly the same, but it’s as close as a digital version can get (so far). Similar to the Wobble app, iJIggly adds some much-needed sexy motion to your iPhone. The app originally comes with a wobbly Jello mould, but can be easily updated to add a nice set of wiggly lady bits. But remember, if an actual girl catches you playing with this thing, expect to be spending a good bit of time alone with Mr. Hand.
Hooters Calendar Girls Crazy Eights
Just like the Hooters Calendar Slider, Hooters Calender Girls Crazy Eights takes an old game and makes it 21st Century sexy by putting the lovely ladies of Hooters on the backs of the playing cards in this asstastic version of crazy eights. But unlike your grandpa’s pack of playing cards, this one has tons of different girls to choose from and gets better every time they update the app.